In exactly 13 days,
I'll be sitting for the deadly Chinese 'O' Level Paper.
Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeam.
Yes.
Pure Raw Terror.
The reality of this major exam has finally hit me.
I've been having panic attacks and sudden hyperventilation outbreaks these days.
& doing chinese comprehension passages like i've got this sadistic craving for them.
(Puh-lease, i get nauseous from doing them! Im like some pathetic pregnant woman.)
But im gonna hold on.
Keep holding on.
I have to get an A.
Have to. Must. Will. Should. Definitely. Absolutely.
So.
What is the most important thing i have to do now???
Of course...
To bloody get my bloody fingers off the bloody keyboard and bloody hold my bloody pen to bloody do my bloody revision.
Apparently, my fingers are glued to the keyboard like some sick old man grabbing on to his wife's saggy tits for his dear life.
Studying is like going on a battlefield.
Its B-L-O-O-D-Y.

ITS BEEN AGES SINCE I LAST BLOGGED! :D
so here i am today.
coughs**
my blog is sure mouldy.
lol. :]]
what should i talk about?

kayy.
i watched " 200 pounds beauty" with ahma, peckhui and liangee last friday.
yeaps. right after physics paper. :D
cant wait lahs.
mm.
that movie's really ichibang neh!
SHOULD CATCH IT.
reall good.
this movie also made me think alot about the past.
especially last November.
i thought.
at leats things werent that bad for me.
im considerably slim;
an avergae-looking face ( at least pple dont scream at the sight of me lah.)
yeaps.
and i can dance quite well i guess :/
so im not as bad as her.
i dont need plastic surgery just yet.
but there was this part;
when she sang the song " Byul" which i guess she had composed with the guy she liked in mind.
i was really touched by tt.
its a really beautiful song. :D
though many said she was hideous.
but i thought she was really pretty even though shes fat.
guys these days only care about having pretty girlfriends.
but they forgot that real jewels do not shine tt brightly after all.
they need time to be dicovered.
& thats what makes them this precious.
towards the later part oh the show.
when the guy finally told hanna he knew her real identity.
hanna said this sentence which made me cry again. ( i cry easily lah. :D cant help it.)
she said - "youve broken my heart. and tissue wont fix it. "
thinking back.
i should have said - "youve broken my heart. and sorry wont fix it."
its the worst word ive ever heard from his mouth since then.
i once heard someone said that when you tyuly loved someone.
even when its all over and youve recovered.
youll still cry when u think back about it.
how true.
very often i think of myself as a strong-willed girl.
but whenever i recall that incident.
so inevitably. tears would just trickle down.
iwonder why.
theres this painful heart wrench.
i know its been half a year.
but.
queerly
this happens.
that was also the first time i ever thought of saying those three words.
only that i jumbled them in korean.
he didnt guess it.
its fate i guess. :/
its doesnt matter.
cause ive learnt not to ever say those 3 words so easily anymore.
til the very last.
ill still lose that magic.
i know i would..

anyway.
heres the translated version of " byul" , which means star in korean.
enjoy! :DD


the wind is shaking the windows,and over my small room,the stars fill up the sky, shining brightly too many to count,the stars reassure tired methey wipe away the many tears that are deep inside me
don’t be hurt too much..they hug me tight and pamper meand comfort me,telling me to go to sleep
though I’m exhausted to the point where I can’t walkthough my tears blur my visionI’ll still smile in front of my love that I’m not able to get
Even though our happy times were short, I’ll treasure it deep inside my heartlike those countless number of stars, forever
My dream is coming. though it is unusual that my one star is brightit is very bright, even blinding..it comes down to my shoulderstop being so sad..it holds my hand as it touches meand gives me a warm hug
though I’m exhausted to the point where I can’t walkthough my tears blur my visionI’ll still smile in front of my love that I’m not able to get
Even though our happy times were short, I’ll treasure it deep inside my heartlike those countless number of stars, forever
Only for today, I won’t cry though my eyes fill with tearsI want to laugh like those starsOh~ I want to cherish all my happy moments deep inside my heartLike those countless number of stars, forever.

nice yeah.
FAT GIRLS RULE! :DDD